The Power of Sin

Lately, I've seen what sin can do to a human life. In fact, I've actually experienced it more and more lately.

Part of what I've been through is the pain of having the power to choose to change. And I have changed. I've changed more than I would ever imagine myself changing. The sad part about it is that even after changing, I'm growing more isolated from people.

I know I must be doing something wrong. I know that, I probably shouldn't isolate myself as I grow in holiness. I am changing. I hadn't realized it but more and more lately, I have been changing. I'm regretting every sin I've made, and I'm becoming more and more repentant of them everyday. I'm facing temptations, and while I am holding most of them, pushing them away, I can't say I've got it made.

I'm really starting to see what Adam and Eve did, and what it was that makes us so weak as humans. Realizing sin leads to shame, and shame to weakness. Lately, I've been so tired. Part of it is because I've tried to be as good as I can, and yet the weight of my sins is overwhelming.

Lord, help me bear this cross, because I know that that's the only way. To live in love for you, and to follow you, to walk with you as you carry my sin in my place. Help me find victory and strength by turning to you. Amen.

So, today was definitely a keeper...

Truly, it was. After a long day, burned arms, tense neck, 13 hours of being in school, and being sick in the midst of it all, I was blessed.

I was actually able to reconnect with old friends, catch glimpses of the faces of close friends, meet new friends, and grow. At least in some confident sense.

What had me most was an email I had never expected to get. Anyways, to make a long story short. It showed me that truly, God is never going to let you suffer, for what He doesn't intend to repay.

On that note, my week was way too long. Tomorrow will be long too, unfortunately. Anyways, I'd write more, but I'm really tired, so I won't.

Lord, tonight, after a day like this, I can only be thankful that, even in my hardest times, you show me love. With the people, the support, the fearlessness you've given me to carry on, I know I will continue to praise you. I want to thank you for the people I've had a chance to reconnect with today. I hadn't really noticed how, in every single one of my friends, lies a continual support and hope bourne of you, and Lord, I just want to make this prayer tonight, my own. After the stresses, the pains, the hurts, the loneliness, you've given me people who care more about me than I ever could imagine. And so, with this prayer as my own, I call out to you Lord, that you never let me go. Lord, your love, is a shadow; it covers me and leads me on in a safety - your love. Lord, I never want to lose your love, so I promise that with all you've given me today, I will forever praise your mercy, I will forever give my all.

Amen.

A Sign of Hope? or A Sign to be Scared?

Okay, so something really, really ambiguously odd happened last night; I can't say in case it might start something, but I don't know what to do.

I'm not sure if I should find hopeful serenity in what happened, or if I should think nothing of it, or even to think it a bad sign. It's really confusing, and some answers are needed. I'm trying to get to the bottom of it, but so far, no luck and I don't see why it could have happened if not for the one feeling that would bring me hope.

I guess that's part of human nature, is to be afraid of the unlikely, and to hope for only good. I guess that's what I see, is the idealist's view of events.

Please Lord, help me  see hope, but above that, the truth, in what's happening. Deep down, I'm really scared, and worried, and most of all uncertain. I would like to hope for the best, to have hope in you, but I can't do that if I'm not even sure where I stand on the matter. I would like for my hope in you, to result in your glorious love shining through, and to be certain of that no matter what, to be firm in my pray, knowing what I ask will be granted. But alas Lord, I'm human. I have no power over you. The world is your domain. And I know your acts are sometimes tests of faith and obedience to you, and so, grant faith, that it may be received to serve you...

Amen.

Brave New Utopia?

I was reading Sir Thomas More's Utopia and Aldous Huxley's Brave New World as of late, and I came to one realization.

Huxley is a biter.

Well, okay, it's not that bad, but Brave New World seems to have far too much in common with Utopia that it probably isn't just a coincidence. Anyways, for what it's worth, I learned a few things about society.

In far too many cases, it's actually impossible to work with what we have and instantly have a perfect society. Ironically, where it does make sense is that if we worked for it, it actually is possible. More says that the key to utopia, as well as Huxley, is that everything needs to be mutual. "Everyone belongs to everyone." The contrast I pulled out of it, was mainly that Brave New World really shows it in a light of impractical insanity, where one "misfit" would screw up the system, and is thus sent far away, where his sense of "self" wouldn't harm the operation.

I'm actually really drawn in by the similarities and what they say, but I'm really eager to look for more in the meaning of things.

tcGb.

What makes it so hard to do...

So today was the second day of classes. The reason I'm taking time out to blog right now, is that, today, every single time I wrote the date, I stop, and think about what's happened, and the fact that, all because of this day, 6 years ago, we lost thousands of lives in North America. A few of the lives lost that day were Canadians. When I got home, my parents were watching the news, and they were talking about a ceremony in Toronto, held for the victims.

I guess the other side of the coin is this; I remember a story about the man who saved many lives, but the sacrifices made to do so. The plane on its way for the White House, hijacked by Al-Qaeda members, was re-directed by a man who, before taking the risk to momentarily take control of the jet, was on the phone with an operator, whom he asked to join him in praying the Apostles' Prayer: The Our Father.

What many people have learned, if in the hardest way possible, is that sacrifice happens, because of the love they have for God's creation. The man who redirected the plane, he sacrificed his, and 39 other people's lives, to save what could have been the world. Almost astonishing, to think of that as a sacrifice in this age, almost comparable to Jesus. But maybe that man learned something about God some of us still lack: that Jesus' love lives in all of us, and at a moment's notice, we should all be willing to love like He did, willing to risk our lives, because we love all of His creation. I personally took out from it that it's times like these that are blessings the most, in disguise, because we know God is there, as hard as it is to see. God is testing us, in some way.

Watching a video online one time, I remember hearing about the meaning of "Namaste," the Indian greeting among brothers, sisters, neighbors, and everyone you meet. It means roughly "That which is from God in me greets that which is from God in you." It really hits hard, that perhaps these events are planned out, so that we can see what God has placed in us for each other. I know I've seen it; it's the light of faith, hope and love. It's the light which we're supposed to let shine, in the name of Love, in the name of God.

Lord, today, I want to pray that we all learn to find that light from you, that you placed in us. I want to ask that whatever we do, we will shout your praise, sing your fame, and shine, with the light of your love for us.

Amen.

p.s. Here's just a couple of links to videos I found really nice to watch, for the faithful hearted Christian, or the regular Christian.

1. Rev. Tom Honey Talks about God: Could God have allowed the Tsunami?

2. The Hope

"The End is Near."

There's a story about two preachers who were fishing by a riverbank when a man drove up and stopped short upon seeing a handwritten sign they had obviously erected: "The End Is Near. Turn Around." "Hey, I don't appreciate that kind of blatant sermonizing," the man shouted to the fishing clerics, and he drove on in a huff. A few moments later came the sound of screeching tires followed by a loud splash. "I told you we should have written 'Bridge Out Ahead,'" said one preacher to another. (Taken from "A Teen's Guide to Christian Living")

The story comes from the section of the book mentioned, entitled "What is (and isn't) sin?" I guess the irony in the story comes from how we're all like that at times. We see something that might somewhat be connect to God, say we don't appreciate it being publicized like that, and end up in a trap. A part of me wants to say I've never gone through this, but I can't help but be honest about it. Everyone's gone through this type of thing. One moment, we see someone professing their faith more prominently than us, evangelizing, speaking out. All of us have reacted even to ourselves being like that, calling it an embarrassment to who we are, to what we call ourselves. The fact is though, most, if not all of us do this. We all run headlong into life's traps, ignoring God, ignoring what God wants, going after all that we want.

Part of it is about ignoring the "doom and gloom" story of the end being near, not preparing for it in prayer, and living life for the moment. Living is okay, but if all you do is live and party, soon, that's who you become: someone who doesn't know God, unprepared for the "Rapture" at the end of time. 

Another lesson comes of Hope - hope and faith in God. I bring this up remembering the YFC conference theme for this year. In Corinthians, Paul writes "God is faithful: He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it" (1 Cor. 10:13).

For me, this quotation has to do with God and how much you're willing to trust Him. Personally, I've been put through way too much by God, and yet, I'm still here, stronger in heart than I've ever been. My strength comes because God's shown me the very limits of what I can go through, and I've been to my near breaking point. These days, I'm still recovering, because I know there's still more that needs to be done, that I'm not back at my peak. It's funny how God can take you from your highest of highs, and drop you to the lowest of lows.

Lord God, my prayer today is that we learn to live according to your will, obedient to everything, eyes, ears and hearts ever open and attentive to your words. Lord, because we're constantly falling into traps, and losing hope, give us peace in our hearts, to trust you, to know you are there. Guide us to your will.

Amen.

**If you're interested, the book I've read, and drew upon for this blog is called "A Teen's Guide to Christian Living." It's co-authored by Bettie B. Youngs, Jennifer Leigh Youngs and Debbie Thurman.

If Just One...

I was reminded of a song today, while blogging and looking through other random sites. The thing that came out to me about this song was when I once shared a talk with a brother of mine. I guess the one thing is, for him, the idea of humility is key. The one thing I remember talking to him about was service, and what he taught me was what the song said:

"If just one should find their way then it's been worth the while."

The song is Clay Aiken's "Go the Distance", and it's a song that is sung in two narrative voices primarily: Jesus, and the singer. It's about being a change in the world, no matter how small the difference. It also kind of reminded me of YFC's C4 Mission and Vision. We're constantly being challenged by the odds, called to make even the smallest difference in the world, to glorify Him.

Aside from that, I guess the song really reminded me that, regardless of size, a blessing is a blessing from God.

Lord God, help us to realize that every single success is a victory for us, granted by your will. Keep us firm in faith, and realize that even the smallest step is a great victory for you O Lord, and always remind us that our humility will only prove to glorify you in our hearts.

Amen.

New Link Update

Hey all.

This post is just an update regarding the new link on my link list (to the right). It's basically a blogspot and every now and again (hopefully daily) I'll be posting a chapter from the book, and you're all free to read it. The link to it is on the right side, directly under "Blogs" so, feel free to visit.

tcGb